As much as I try to sing the optimistic songs, and support my friends, and allay their fears, the truth of the matter is that I am as worried about all this as anyone else. I've kept myself very busy with work and keeping in touch with people who live alone, with writing, reading, and playing WAY too many word games on my phone. I thought I was doing pretty well and being the good soldier until I took my blood pressure a couple of days ago. The top number was larger than my highest weight by at least thirty (and I'm talking about when I was 42 years old and nine months pregnant). The lower number was a score I would have been proud to get on any high school test. In short, the stress was announcing its sneaky presence in my body, even if my head was not giving it any room. A change in medication will help the blood pressure. Now I need to learn to let all this into my conscious mind where I can see it and deal with it.
There are things to do. I have given up walking because of people without masks, and horror stories on television, and, oh yeah, my own laziness. That has to change and it can change. I'll start with a 30 minute walk, rain, shine, or snow once a day. I can build on it from there. I can spend more time praying or meditating, or whatever calms me down. I can get more sleep and eat healthier food. None of this, of course, will make COVID-19 go away. Some of it will protect me. None of it will hurt me. And if I plan to continue to bring any comfort and strength to my friends and family (and I do) I can't enter the battle unarmed.
My silly Christmas tree is still lit every night and is still the talk of the neighborhood. I have shared my brilliant idea of sewing buttons on my baseball hats (just above each ear) to make my masks hurt less. And if I'm a little slower than usual getting back to those of you who reach out to me, don't worry. I'm just following my own advice and spending some time taking better care of myself. My mother was right. You can't pour from an empty kettle.
There are things to do. I have given up walking because of people without masks, and horror stories on television, and, oh yeah, my own laziness. That has to change and it can change. I'll start with a 30 minute walk, rain, shine, or snow once a day. I can build on it from there. I can spend more time praying or meditating, or whatever calms me down. I can get more sleep and eat healthier food. None of this, of course, will make COVID-19 go away. Some of it will protect me. None of it will hurt me. And if I plan to continue to bring any comfort and strength to my friends and family (and I do) I can't enter the battle unarmed.
My silly Christmas tree is still lit every night and is still the talk of the neighborhood. I have shared my brilliant idea of sewing buttons on my baseball hats (just above each ear) to make my masks hurt less. And if I'm a little slower than usual getting back to those of you who reach out to me, don't worry. I'm just following my own advice and spending some time taking better care of myself. My mother was right. You can't pour from an empty kettle.
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