I woke at 5:30 without benefit of the alarm clock, which surprised me, considering I was at the subway at midnight picking up Son Number One after his shift ended. The room was darker than I had expected it to be. August is like that. Daylight leaks out of the day like tea from a cracked mug. The windows were open because the temperatures were cool overnight and it's always nice to get fresh air in the room and not depend on the fans or air conditioners to pull it in. And then it hit me. All I could hear was the hum of distant traffic. Where are my birds? They did it to me again! They packed their birdie bags and slipped away when I wasn't paying attention.
It wouldn't have been a tearful goodbye. I knew it was coming. There are still a few sparrows and the odd robin who winters over. Not all the birds are gone. Why do I always feel guilty that I haven't paid close enough attention to their song? In addition to the fact that daily exercise is a promise I make and break with depressing regularity, I find myself wishing I'd gotten up early every morning and gone for a walk just for the pleasure of the symphony we have access to for such a short time each year. There are still heat waves ahead of us, I suspect. It's only early August, after all. But that beautiful background music is gone for another year and I'm missing it. This is another reminder, as if I needed one, that the boys will be going back to school in less than two weeks and the house will be neater (some) and quieter (too much). My heart aches just a little.
Before long the windows will be closed overnight and the traffic hum will be less noticeable, then there will be autumn winds, followed by snow, and before you know it, robin song again, because life goes by about that fast. Next time I'll pay closer attention. And maybe I'll stare at leaves and snowflakes a little closer this year, too. But I'm already longing for spring.
It wouldn't have been a tearful goodbye. I knew it was coming. There are still a few sparrows and the odd robin who winters over. Not all the birds are gone. Why do I always feel guilty that I haven't paid close enough attention to their song? In addition to the fact that daily exercise is a promise I make and break with depressing regularity, I find myself wishing I'd gotten up early every morning and gone for a walk just for the pleasure of the symphony we have access to for such a short time each year. There are still heat waves ahead of us, I suspect. It's only early August, after all. But that beautiful background music is gone for another year and I'm missing it. This is another reminder, as if I needed one, that the boys will be going back to school in less than two weeks and the house will be neater (some) and quieter (too much). My heart aches just a little.
Before long the windows will be closed overnight and the traffic hum will be less noticeable, then there will be autumn winds, followed by snow, and before you know it, robin song again, because life goes by about that fast. Next time I'll pay closer attention. And maybe I'll stare at leaves and snowflakes a little closer this year, too. But I'm already longing for spring.
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